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Captain Scraggs - or, The Green-Pea Pirates by Peter B. (Peter Bernard) Kyne
page 64 of 333 (19%)
As a preliminary move, Captain Scraggs declared in favour of a
couple of cocktails to whet their appetites for the French
dinner, and accordingly the trio repaired to an adjacent saloon
and tucked three each under their belts--all at Captain Scraggs's
expense. When he proposed a fourth, Mr. Gibney's perfect
sportsmanship caused him to protest, and reluctantly Captain
Scraggs permitted Gibney to buy. Scraggs decided to have a cigar,
however, instead of another Martini. The ethics of the situation
then indicated that McGuffey should "set 'em up," which he did
over Captain Scraggs's protest--and again the wary Scraggs called
for a cigar, alleging as an excuse for his weakness that for
years three cocktails before dinner had been his absolute limit.
A fourth cocktail on an empty stomach, he declared, would kill
the evening for him.

The fourth cocktail having been disposed of, the barkeeper,
sensing further profit did he but play his part judiciously,
insisted that his customers have a drink on the house. Captain
Scraggs immediately protested that their party was degenerating
into an endurance contest--and called for another cigar. He now
had three cigars, so he gave one each to his victims and forcibly
dragged them away from the bar and up to a Pine Street French
restaurant, the proprietor of which was an Italian. Captain
Scraggs was for walking the six blocks to this restaurant, but
Mr. McGuffey had acquired, on six cocktails, what is colloquially
described as "a start," and insisted upon chartering a taxicab.

But why descend to sordid and vulgar details? Suffice that when
the artful Scraggs, pretending to be overcome by his potations
and very ill into the bargain, begged to be delivered back aboard
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