change which took place in my own mind with regard to Christianity. One
great cause of my separation from the Church, and then of my
estrangement from Christ, was the influence of bad feeling which took
possession of my mind towards a number of my brother ministers.




CHAPTER IV.

ORIGIN OF THE UNHAPPY FEELING--CHARACTERISTICS OF THE AUTHOR'S
MIND--RATIONALIZING TENDENCY.


How came I to be the subject of this bad feeling? I will tell you.

As a young minister I had two or three marked tendencies. One may be
called a rationalizing tendency. I was anxious, in the first place,
clearly to understand all my professed beliefs, and to be able, in the
second place, to make them plain to others. I never liked to travel in a
fog, wrapped round as with a blinding cloud, unable either to see my
way, or to get a view of the things with which I was surrounded. I liked
a clear, bright sky, with the sun shining full upon my path, and
gladdening my eyes with a view of a thousand interesting objects. And so
with regard to spiritual matters. I never liked to travel in theological
fogs. They pressed on me at the outset of my religious life, on every
side, hiding from my view the wonders and the glories of God's word and
works; but I never rested in the darkness. I longed and prayed for light
with all my soul, and sought for it with all my powers. Regarding the
Bible as God's Book, given to man for his instruction and salvation, I