strict. Dr. Sandford to be sure had no right to make his care
like this. I did not know that Mr. Thorold had; but I found it
was indisputable. And in proportion it was delightful. We had
a slow, very busy walk and talk until within a few doors of my
Washington home; there we parted, with a long hand clasp, and
the promise on my part that Mr. Thorold should find me at the
same hour and place as to-day on the next evening.

Nobody was looking for me, and I gained my room in safety. I
was very happy, yet not all happy; for the first use I made of
my solitude, after getting rid of my bonnet and mantilla, was
to sit down and cry. I asked myself the reason, for I did not
like to be in the dark about my own feelings; this time they
were in a good deal of confusion.

As I look back, I think the uppermost thing was my happiness;
this new, delicate, strange joy which had come into my life
and which I had never tasted so fully or known the flavour of
it so intimately as this evening. Looks and tones, and little
nameless things of manner telling almost more yet, came back
to me in a small crowd and overwhelmed me with their
testimony. Affection, and tenderness, and pleasure; and
something apart from these, an inexplicable assuming of me and
delight in me as so assumed; they found me or made me very
weak to-night. What was the matter? I believe it was, first,
this happiness; and next, the doubt that rested over it and
the certainty that I must leave it. Certainly my weeping was
hearty enough to answer to all three causes. It was a very
unaccustomed indulgence to me; or not an indulgence at all,
for I was not fond of tears; but it did act as a relief. I