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The Wit and Humor of America, Volume III. (of X.) by Various
page 144 of 202 (71%)
wasn't, they wouldn't be traters. They conspire to bust up a
country--they fail, and they're traters. They bust her, and they become
statesmen and heroes.

Take the case of Gloster, afterward Old Dick the Three, who may be seen
at the Tower on horseback, in a heavy tin overcoat--take Mr. Gloster's
case. Mr. G. was a conspirator of the basist dye, and if he'd failed, he
would have been hung on a sour apple tree. But Mr. G. succeeded, and
became great. He was slewed by Col. Richmond, but he lives in history,
and his equestrian figger may be seen daily for a sixpence, in
conjunction with other em'nent persons, and no extra charge for the
Warder's able and bootiful lectur.

There's one king in this room who is mounted onto a foaming steed, his
right hand graspin a barber's pole. I didn't learn his name.

The room where the daggers and pistils and other weppins is kept is
interestin. Among this collection of choice cuttlery I notist the bow
and arrer which those hot-heded old chaps used to conduct battles with.
It is quite like the bow and arrer used at this day by certain tribes of
American Injuns, and they shoot 'em off with such a excellent precision
that I almost sigh'd to be an Injun when I was in the Rocky Mountain
regin. They are a pleasant lot them Injuns. Mr. Cooper and Dr. Catlin
have told us of the red man's wonerful eloquence, and I found it so. Our
party was stopt on the plains of Utah by a band of Shoshones, whose
chief said:

"Brothers! the pale-face is welcome. Brothers! the sun is sinking in the
west, and Wa-na-bucky-she will soon cease speakin. Brothers! the poor
red man belongs to a race which is fast becomin extink."
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