A Christmas Story - Man in His Element: or, A New Way to Keep House by Samuel W. Francis
page 16 of 35 (45%)
page 16 of 35 (45%)
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But they rallied--a revolt was imminent. I had lived in the family one
year, with my sister as housekeeper, and had never made a remark to the servants, it being my habit in life to submit to what was not my business, or clear out. But now--_now_, with Imprimatur on my forehead, a clutch in my mental fingers, and a hungry longing to rule free: ha! ha!--Let us see. This was a trying moment--The vessel had been signalled, and my colors were to be shown--so here they go--the flag of the little brig 'one-man-power,' with the motto 'Anvil or hammar answer hammar,' is unfurled. Hemmed in by swelling indignation, whisperings and sullen looks, I jumped up and yelled in stentorian voice: 'Leave my room! How dare you answer the waiter's bell? Send me the waiter and clear out, every one of you!' and, with a sweeping wave of my hand, I stalked towards the door. Reader, did you ever see the sun chase a big cloud right off a green field, and, with no respite, drive it headlong away over beyond the horizon? Such was the rapid departure of my stupefied retainers. On reaching the door, I slammed it to with a violence that echoed through the hushed and palsied house. Oh the benefit of a good slam--not a push--nor a quick shut--nor even a bump, all of which show still a want of firmness and decision--but a good old-fashioned 'bang' as though it had got into your throat and you could'nt breathe--that life depended on shutting out a flash of lightning and you hadn't time to wait--that the harder you impelled it against the doorway the sooner would end fast fleeting agony--that the nearer you got to what might be called an _explosive shut_: the more complete would be your safety, that if all your concentrated passion could be, not flung, (that is too weak) but hurled at that one partition |
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