As I said, the ladies and gentlemen were inclined to sneer, and
were giggling audibly. I led the dear girl to a chair, and,
scowling round with a tremendous fierceness, which those who know
me know I can sometimes put on, I shouted out, "Hark ye! men and
women--I am this lady's truest knight--her husband I hope one day
to be. I am commander, too, in this fort--the enemy is without it;
another word of mockery--another glance of scorn--and, by Heaven, I
will hurl every man and woman from the battlements, a prey to the
ruffianly Holkar!" This quieted them. I am a man of my word, and
none of them stirred or looked disrespectfully from that moment.

It was now my turn to make them look foolish. Mrs.
Vandegobbleschroy (whose unfailing appetite is pretty well known to
every person who has been in India) cried, "Well, Captain Gahagan,
your ball has been so pleasant, and the supper was despatched so
long ago, that myself and the ladies would be very glad of a little
breakfast." And Mrs. Van giggled as if she had made a very witty
and reasonable speech. "Oh! breakfast, breakfast, by all means,"
said the rest; "we really are dying for a warm cup of tea."

"Is it bohay tay or souchong tay that you'd like, ladies?" says I.

"Nonsense, you silly man; any tea you like," said fat Mrs. Van.

"What do you say, then, to some prime GUNPOWDER?" Of course they
said it was the very thing.

"And do you like hot rowls or cowld--muffins or crumpets--fresh
butter or salt? And you, gentlemen, what do you say to some