not hide from you that the love I have for Louis de l'Estorade is not
of the kind which makes the heart throb at the sound of a step, and
thrills us at the lightest tones of a voice, or the caress of a
burning glance; but, on the other hand, there is nothing in him which
offends me.

What am I to do, you will ask, with that instinct for all which is
great and noble, with those mental energies, which have made the link
between us, and which we still possess? I admit that this thought has
troubled me. But are these faculties less ours because we keep them
concealed, using them only in secret for the welfare of the family, as
instruments to produce the happiness of those confided to our care, to
whom we are bound to give ourselves without reserve? The time during
which a woman can look for admiration is short, it will soon be past;
and if my life has not been a great one, it will at least have been
calm, tranquil, free from shocks.

Nature has favored our sex in giving us a choice between love and
motherhood. I have made mine. My children shall be my gods, and this
spot of earth my Eldorado.

I can say no more to-day. Thank you much for all the things you have
sent me. Give a glance at my needs on the enclosed list. I am
determined to live in an atmosphere of refinement and luxury, and to
take from provincial life only what makes its charm. In solitude a
woman can never be vulgarized--she remains herself. I count greatly on
your kindness for keeping me up to the fashion. My father-in-law is so
delighted that he can refuse me nothing, and turns his house upside
down. We are getting workpeople from Paris and renovating everything.