STAYS A sort of straight-jacket employed in reforming women.

STOCKINGS Woman's only savings for A Rainy Day.

STOCKS An unreliable commodity bought and sold by gamblers. If
you win, it's an investment; if you lose, a speculation.

STOVE-PIPE A movable cylinder used as a receptacle for smoke and
profanity.

SPRING Formerly a very delightful season but now obsolete except
in poetry and the Old Farmer's Almanac.

SPINSTER An ember from which the sparks have flown.

SUBWAY In Boston, a place where one may enjoy continuous
disturbance of the peace, disorderly conduct, assault and battery,
riot and rebellion. These events are allowed by law, and the
entry-fee is five cents.

SUCCESS A goal usually reached by those who employ their time in
cultivating a more definite aim in life rather than in searching
for a larger target.

SUMMER An oppressive and expensive season invented by rural
cottage and hotel owners, railroad and steamboat companies and the
Iceman.

SUN A yellow arrival from Way Down East, who goes west daily,
operates a heating and lighting trust, draws water, prints