"Give prisint condition," he repeated thoughtfully. "Now what do thim
clerks be wantin' to know, I wonder! 'Prisint condition, 'is ut? Thim
pigs, praise St. Patrick, do be in good health, so far as I know, but I
niver was no veternairy surgeon to dago pigs. Mebby thim clerks wants me
to call in the pig docther an' have their pulses took. Wan thing I do
know, howiver, which is they've glorious appytites for pigs of their
soize. Ate? They'd ate the brass padlocks off of a barn door I If the
paddy pig, by the same token, ate as hearty as these dago pigs do, there'd
be a famine in Ireland."

To assure himself that his report would be up to date, Flannery went to
the rear of the office and looked into the cage. The pigs had been
transferred to a larger box--a dry goods box.

"Wan, -- two, -- t'ree, -- four, -- five, -- six, -- sivin, -- eight!" he
counted. "Sivin spotted an' wan all black. All well an' hearty an' all
eatin' loike ragin' hippypottymusses. He went back to his desk and wrote.

"Mr. Morgan, Head of Tariff Department," he wrote. "Why do I say dago pigs
is pigs because they is pigs and will be til you say they ain't which is
what the rule book says stop your jollying me you know it as well as I do.
As to health they are all well and hoping you are the same. P. S. There
are eight now the family increased all good eaters. P. S. I paid out so
far two dollars for cabbage which they like shall I put in bill for same
what?"

Morgan, head of the Tariff Department, when he received this letter,
laughed. He read it again and became serious.