forget your Mamma. She was not a being of earth--she was an angel from
Heaven. When her soul has entered the heavenly kingdom she will continue
to love you and to be proud of you even there."

"But why do you say 'when her soul has entered the heavenly kingdom'?" I
asked. "I believe it is there now."

"No, my dearest," replied Natalia as she lowered her voice and pressed
herself yet closer to me, "her soul is still here," and she pointed
upwards. She spoke in a whisper, but with such an intensity of
conviction that I too involuntarily raised my eyes and looked at the
ceiling, as though expecting to see something there. "Before the souls
of the just enter Paradise they have to undergo forty trials for forty
days, and during that time they hover around their earthly home." [A
Russian popular legend.]

She went on speaking for some time in this strain--speaking with the
same simplicity and conviction as though she were relating common things
which she herself had witnessed, and to doubt which could never enter
into any one's head. I listened almost breathlessly, and though I did
not understand all she said, I never for a moment doubted her word.

"Yes, my darling, she is here now, and perhaps looking at us and
listening to what we are saying," concluded Natalia. Raising her head,
she remained silent for a while. At length she wiped away the tears
which were streaming from her eyes, looked me straight in the face, and
said in a voice trembling with emotion:

"Ah, it is through many trials that God is leading me to Him. Why,
indeed, am I still here? Whom have I to live for? Whom have I to love?"