eagerness to the dessert, and the whole place was instantly in
commotion. There was nothing but justling, scrambling, pulling,
snatching, struggling, scolding, and screaming. The nosegays were
torn from one another's hands and bosoms; the glasses and china
went to wreck; the tables and floors were strewed with comfits.
Some cried; some swore; and the tropes and figures of
Billingsgate were used without reserve in all their native zest
and flavour; nor were those flowers of rhetoric unattended with
significant gesticulation. Some snapped their fingers; some
forked them out; some clapped their hands, and some their back-sides;
at length, they fairly proceeded to pulling caps, and
every thing seemed to presage a general battle; when Holder
ordered his horns to sound a charge, with a view to animate the
combatants, and inflame the contest; but this manoeuvre produced
an effect quite contrary to what he expected. It was a note of
reproach that roused them to an immediate sense of their
disgraceful situation. They were ashamed of their absurd
deportment, and suddenly desisted. They gathered up their caps,
ruffles, and handkerchiefs; and great part of them retired in
silent mortification.

Quin laughed at this adventure; but my uncle's delicacy was hurt.
He hung his head in manifest chagrin, and seemed to repine at the
triumph of his judgment -- Indeed, his victory was more complete
than he imagined; for, as we afterwards learned, the two amazons
who singularized themselves most in the action, did not come from
the purlieus of Puddle-dock, but from the courtly neighbourhood
of St James's palace. One was a baroness, and the other, a
wealthy knight's dowager -- My uncle spoke not a word, till we had
made our retreat good to the coffee-house; where, taking off his