luncheon table, and sets if before Crampton.) Yes, sir, you never can
tell. There was my son, sir! who ever thought that he would rise to
wear a silk gown, sir? And yet to-day, sir, nothing less than fifty
guineas, sir. What a lesson, sir!

CRAMPTON. Well, I hope he is grateful to you, and recognizes what he
owes you.

WAITER. We get on together very well, very well indeed, sir,
considering the difference in our stations. (With another of his
irresistible transitions.) A small lump of sugar, sir, will take the
flatness out of the seltzer without noticeably sweetening the drink,
sir. Allow me, sir. (He drops a lump of sugar into the tumbler.) But
as I say to him, where's the difference after all? If I must put on a
dress coat to show what I am, sir, he must put on a wig and gown to show
what he is. If my income is mostly tips, and there's a pretence that I
don't get them, why, his income is mostly fees, sir; and I understand
there's a pretence that he don't get them! If he likes society, and his
profession brings him into contact with all ranks, so does mine, too,
sir. If it's a little against a barrister to have a waiter for his
father, sir, it's a little against a waiter to have a barrister for a
son: many people consider it a great liberty, sir, I assure you, sir.
Can I get you anything else, sir?

CRAMPTON. No, thank you. (With bitter humility.) I suppose that's
no objection to my sitting here for a while: I can't disturb the party
on the beach here.

WAITER (with emotion). Very kind of you, sir, to put it as if it was
not a compliment and an honour to us, Mr. Crampton, very kind indeed.