because you have drunk a little too much at luncheon. Do I not
know that what I have asked you to do is foolish and wrong, and
that the General will be angry about it? But I want to have a
good laugh, all the same. I want that, and nothing else. Why
should you insult a woman, indeed? Well, you will be given a
sound thrashing for so doing."

I turned away, and went silently to do her bidding. Of course
the thing was folly, but I could not get out of it. I remember
that, as I approached the Baroness, I felt as excited as a
schoolboy. I was in a frenzy, as though I were drunk.

VI

Two days have passed since that day of lunacy. What a noise and
a fuss and a chattering and an uproar there was! And what a
welter of unseemliness and disorder and stupidity and bad
manners! And I the cause of it all! Yet part of the scene was
also ridiculous--at all events to myself it was so. I am not
quite sure what was the matter with me--whether I was merely
stupefied or whether I purposely broke loose and ran amok.
At times my mind seems all confused; while at other times
I seem almost to be back in my childhood, at the school desk,
and to have done the deed simply out of mischief.

It all came of Polina--yes, of Polina. But for her, there might
never have been a fracas. Or perhaps I did the deed in a fit of
despair (though it may be foolish of me to think so)? What there
is so attractive about her I cannot think. Yet there IS
something attractive about her--something passing fair, it would