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Condensed Novels: New Burlesques by Bret Harte
page 57 of 123 (46%)
wives and daughters--as became a young gallant of the time. I,
being a plain, blunt man, assisted in no such folly, but contented
myself, when they complayned to me, with damning their souls for
greasy interfering varlets. For I shall now make no scruple in
declaring that my Lord was the most noble Earl of Southampton,
being withheld from so saying before through very plainness and
bluntness, desiring as a simple yeoman to make no boast of serving
a man of so high quality.

We fared on over Bankside to the Globe playhouse, where my Lord
bade me dismount and deliver a secret message to the chief player--
which message was, "had he diligently perused and examined that he
wot of, and what said he thereof?" Which I did. Thereupon he that
was called the chief player did incontinently proceed to load mine
arms and wallet with many and divers rolls of manuscripts in my
Lord's own hand, and bade me say unto him that there was a great
frost over London, but that if he were to perform those plays and
masques publickly, there would be a greater frost there--to wit, in
the Globe playhouse. This I did deliver with the Manuscripts to my
Lord, who changed countenance mightily at the sight of them, but
could make nought of the message. At which the lad who held the
horses before the playhouse--one Will Shakespeare--split with
laughter. Whereat my Lord cursed him for a deer-stealing, coney-
catching Warwickshire lout, and cuffed him soundly. I wot there
will be those who remember that this Will Shakespeare afterwards
became a player and did write plays--which were acceptable even to
the Queen's Majesty's self--and I set this down not from vanity to
shew I have held converse with such, nor to give a seemingness and
colour to my story, but to shew what ill-judged, misinformed knaves
were they who did afterwards attribute friendship between my Lord
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