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The Sleeping-Car, a farce by William Dean Howells
page 20 of 38 (52%)
bewilderment.]

THE CONDUCTOR (to MR. ROBERTS). Have you been making all this row,
waking up my passengers?

THE CALIFORNIAN. No, sir, he hasn't. I've been making this row. This
gentleman was peaceably looking for his wife, and I misunderstood him.
You want to say anything to me?

THE CONDUCTOR (silently taking THE CALIFORNIAN'S measure with his eye, as
he stands six fret in his stockings). If I did, I'd get the biggest
brakeman I could find to do it for me. _I've_ got nothing to say except
that I think you'd better all go back to bed again.

[He goes out, and the passengers disappear one by one, leaving the
ROBERTSES and THE CALIFORNIAN alone.]

THE CALIFORNIAN (to MR. ROBERTS). Stranger, I'm sorry I got you into
this scrape.

MR. ROBERTS. Oh, don't speak of it, my dear sir. I'm sure we owe you
all sorts of apologies, which I shall be most happy to offer you at my
house in Boston, with every needful explanation. [He takes out his card,
and gives it to THE CALIFORNIAN, who looks at it, and then looks at MR.
ROBERTS curiously.] There's my address, and I'm sure we shall both be
glad to have you call.

MRS. ROBERTS. Oh, yes indeed. [THE CALIFORNIAN parts the curtains of
his berth to re-enter it.] Good-night, sir, and I assure you _we_ shall
do nothing more to disturb you--shall we, Edward?
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