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Lincoln's Yarns and Stories: a complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story teller by Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly) McClure
page 30 of 602 (04%)
To one of his queries as to the safety of Washington, General
Scott had replied, "It has been ordained, Mr. President, that the
city shall not be captured by the Confederates."

"But we ought to have more men and guns here," was the Chief
Executive's answer. "The Confederates are not such fools as to
let a good chance to capture Washington go by, and even if it has
been ordained that the city is safe, I'd feel easier if it were
better protected. All this reminds me of the old trapper out in
the West who had been assured by some 'city folks' who had hired
him as a guide that all matters regarding life and death were
prearranged.

"'It is ordained,' said one of the party to the old trapper,
'that you are to die at a certain time, and no one can kill you
before that time. If you met a thousand Indians, and your death
had not been ordained for that day, you would certainly escape.'

"'I don't exactly understand this "ordained" business,' was the
trapper's reply. 'I don't care to run no risks. I always have my
gun with me, so that if I come across some reds I can feel sure
that I won't cross the Jordan 'thout taking some of 'em with me.
Now, for instance, if I met an Indian in the woods; he drew a
bead on me--sayin', too, that he wasn't more'n ten feet away--an'
I didn't have nothing to protect myself; say it was as bad as
that, the redskin bein' dead ready to kill me; now, even if it
had been ordained that the Indian (sayin' he was a good shot),
was to die that very minute, an' I wasn't, what would I do 'thout
my gun?'

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