what kind of advice is wanted, then give that." But this is not the way
of a friend. He has in mind the welfare of the friend and the cause his
friend serves. Honor does not require that one shall follow the advise
of his friend, rather liberty in this is a mark of freedom and trust
between friends.

A friend aids one in the carrying out of his life purposes. Who is it
that helps one to places of honor and usefulness? It is his friend. Who
is it that recognizes one's true worth, extols his virtues, and gives tone
and quality to the diligent services of months and years? It is his
friend. Who is it, when one ends his life in the midst of an unfinished
book, or with loose ends of continued research in philosophy or science
all about him; who is it that gathers up these loose ends and puts in order
the unfinished work? It is his friend. Who is it that stands by the open
tomb of that fallen saint or hero and relates to the world his deeds of
sacrifice and courage which spurn others on to nobler living and thereby
perpetuates his goodness and valor? Who does this, if it is done? It is
his friend. A friend thus becomes not only a completion of one's soul
as he is by virtue of being a friend, but also he becomes a completion
of one's life. Then, one's relation to his fellowmen is a limited
relationship. He may speak, but upon certain subjects, on certain
occasions, and to certain persons. As Francis Bacon says, "A man can
not speak to his son but as a father; to his wife but as a husband; to his
enemy but upon terms; whereas a friend may speak as the case requires,
and not as it sorteth with the person....I have given the rule," says he,
"where a man can not fitly play his own part, if he have not a friend, he
may quit the stage."


HOW TO GET AND KEEP A FRIEND.