them long enough to expect deliverance. Peace was a very distant
prospect. The King had commanded that such a prison should be built
as should exclude all necessity of a sentinel, in order that I might
not converse with and seduce them from what is called their duty:
and, in the first days of despair, deliverance appeared impossible;
and the fetters, the war, the pain I felt, the place, the length of
time, each circumstance seemed equally impossible to support. A
thousand reasons convinced me it was necessary to end my sufferings.
I shall not enter into theological disputes: let those who blame me
imagine themselves in my situation; or rather let them first
actually endure my miseries, and then let them reason. I had often
braved death in prosperity, and at this moment it seemed a blessing.

Full of these meditations, every minute's patience appeared
absurdity, and resolution meanness of soul; yet I wished my mind
should be satisfied that reason, and not rashness, had induced the
act. I therefore determined, that I might examine the question
coolly, to wait a week longer, and die on the fourth of July. In
the meantime I revolved in my mind what possible means there were of
escape, not fearing, naked and chained, to rush and expire on the
bayonets of my enemies.

The next day I observed, as the four doors were opened, that they
were only of wood, therefore questioned whether I might not even cut
off the locks with the knife that I had so fortunately concealed:
and should this and every other means fail, then would be the time
to die. I likewise determined to make an attempt to free myself of
my chains. I happily forced my right hand through the handcuff,
though the blood trickled from my nails. My attempts on the left
were long ineffectual; but by rubbing with a brick, which I got from