CHAPTER XII--ON CLERICAL SNOBS AND SNOBBISHNESS

'Dear Mr. Snob,' an amiable young correspondent writes, who signs
himself Snobling, 'ought the clergyman who, at the request of a noble
Duke, lately interrupted a marriage ceremony between two persons
perfectly authorised to marry, to be ranked or not among the Clerical
Snobs?'

This, my dear young friend, is not a fair question. One of the
illustrated weekly papers has already seized hold of the clergyman,
and blackened him most unmercifully, by representing him in his cassock
performing the marriage service. Let that be sufficient punishment; and,
if you please, do not press the query.

It is very likely that if Miss Smith had come with a licence to marry
Jones, the parson in question, not seeing old Smith present, would have
sent off the beadle in a cab to let the old gentleman know what was
going on; and would have delayed the service until the arrival of Smith
senior. He very likely thinks it his duty to ask all marriageable young
ladies, who come without their papa, why their parent is absent; and, no
doubt, ALWAYS sends off the beadle for that missing governor.

Or, it is very possible that the Duke of Coeurdelion was Mr.
What-d'ye-call'im's most intimate friend, and has often said to him,
'What-d'ye-call'im, my boy, my daughter must never marry the Capting.
If ever they try at your church, I beseech you, considering the terms of
intimacy on which we are, to send off Rattan in a hack cab to fetch me.'