Chapter 15. Concerning Gas in Politics

SINCE the eighty-cent gas bill was defeated in Albany,
everybody's talkin' about senators bein' bribed. Now, I wasn't in the
Senate last session, and I don't know the ins and outs of everything
that was done, but I can tell you that the legislators are often
hauled over the coals when they are all on the level I've been there
and I know. For instance, when I voted in the Senate in 1904, for
the Remsen Bill that the newspapers called the "Astoria Gas Grab
Bill," they didn't do a thing to me. The papers kept up a howl about
all the supporters of the bill bein' bought up by the Consolidated
Gas Company, and the Citizens' Union did me the honor to call me
the commander-in-chief of the "Black Horse Cavalry."

The fact is that I was workin' for my district all this time, and I
wasn't bribed by nobody. There's several of these gashouses in the
district, and I wanted to get them over to Astoria for three reasons:
first, because they're nuisances; second, because there's no votes in
them for me any longer; third, because-well, I had a little private
reason which I'll explain further on. I needn't explain how they're
nuisances. They're worse than open sewers. Still, I might have
stood that if they hadn't degenerated so much in the last few years.

Ah, gashouses ain't what they used to be! Not very long ago, each
gashouse was good for a couple of hundred votes. All the men
employed in them were Irish-men and Germans who lived in the
district. Now, it is all different. The men are dagoes who live
across in Jersey and take no interest in the district. What's the use
of havin' ill-smellin' gashouses if there's no votes in them?