have invariably found them dull to a degree, and as for information,
without a particle of it. Sir, I actually asked one of these fellows,
"What was the nick to seven?" and he stared in my face and said he
didn't know. He was hugely over-dressed in satin, rings, chains and
so forth; and at the beginning of dinner was disposed to be rather
talkative and pert; but my little sally silenced HIM, I promise you,
and got up a good laugh at his expense too. "Leave George alone,"
said little Lord Cinqbars, "I warrant he'll be a match for any of
you literary fellows." Cinqbars is no great wiseacre; but, indeed, it
requires no great wiseacre to know THAT.

What is the simple deduction to be drawn from this truth? Why,
this--that a man to be amusing and well-informed, has no need of
books at all, and had much better go to the world and to men for his
knowledge. There was Ulysses, now, the Greek fellow engaged in the
Trojan war, as I dare say you know; well, he was the cleverest man
possible, and how? From having seen men and cities, their manners noted
and their realms surveyed, to be sure. So have I. I have been in every
capital, and can order a dinner in every language in Europe.

My notion, then, is this. I have a great deal of spare time on my hands,
and as I am told you pay a handsome sum to persons writing for you, I
will furnish you occasionally with some of my views upon men and things;
occasional histories of my acquaintance, which I think may amuse you;
personal narratives of my own; essays, and what not. I am told that I do
not spell correctly. This of course I don't know; but you will remember
that Richelieu and Marlborough could not spell, and egad! I am an honest
man, and desire to be no better than they. I know that it is the matter,
and not the manner, which is of importance. Have the goodness, then, to
let one of your understrappers correct the spelling and the grammar