MAGISTRATE. [Somewhat puzzled.] Well, did he help you to open the
door, as he says? Did any one help you to open the door?

JACK. No, sir--I don't think so, sir--I don't know.

MAGISTRATE. You don't know? But you must know. It is n't a usual
thing for you to have the door opened for you, is it?

JACK. [With a shamefaced smile.] No.

MAGISTRATE. Very well, then----

JACK. [Desperately.] The fact of the matter is, sir, I'm afraid
I'd had too much champagne that night.

MAGISTRATE. [Smiling.] Oh! you'd had too much champagne?

JONES. May I ask the gentleman a question?

MAGISTRATE. Yes--yes--you may ask him what questions you like.

JONES. Don't you remember you said you was a Liberal, same as your
father, and you asked me wot I was?

JACK. [With his hand against his brow.] I seem to remember----

JONES. And I said to you, "I'm a bloomin' Conservative," I said;
an' you said to me, "You look more like one of these 'ere
Socialists. Take wotever you like," you said.