doubt that I was aware of the refusal she had met with. The fact of her
not mentioning it proved to me that she was jealous of her own dignity;
it afforded me great gratification, and I thought her worthy of
adoration. I saw clearly that she could have no love for M. D---- R-----,
and that she was not loved by him, and the discovery made me leap for
joy. From that moment I felt I was in love with her, and I conceived the
hope that she might return my ardent affection.

The first thing I did, when I returned to my room, was to cross out with
ink every word of her note of hand, except her name, in such a manner
that it was impossible to guess at the contents, and putting it in an
envelope carefully sealed, I deposited it in the hands of a public notary
who stated, in the receipt he gave me of the envelope, that he would
deliver it only to Madame F-----, whenever she should request its
delivery.

The same evening M. F---- came to the bank, paid me, played with cash in
hand, and won some fifty ducats. What caused me the greatest surprise was
that M. D---- R---- continued to be very gracious to Madame F----, and
that she remained exactly the same towards him as she used to be before.
He did not even enquire what she wanted when she had sent for me. But if
she did not seem to change her manner towards my master, it was a very
different case with me, for whenever she was opposite to me at dinner,
she often addressed herself to me, and she thus gave me many
opportunities of shewing my education and my wit in amusing stories or in
remarks, in which I took care to blend instruction with witty jests. At
that time F---- had the great talent of making others laugh while I kept a
serious countenance myself. I had learnt that accomplishment from M. de
Malipiero, my first master in the art of good breeding, who used to say
to me,--