A Spirit in Prison by Robert Smythe Hichens
page 53 of 862 (06%)
page 53 of 862 (06%)
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"No, Emile. Is that very horrible, very unnatural?" "Why should it be?" "I have tried--I have tried for years, Emile, to make Vere enough. I have even been false with myself. I have said to myself that she was enough. I did that after I knew that I could never produce work of any value. When Vere was a baby I lived only for her. Again, when she was beginning to grow up, I tried to live, I did live only for her. And I remember I used to say, I kept on saying to myself, 'This is enough for me. I do not need any more than this. I have had my life. I am now a middle-aged woman. I must live in my child. This will be my satisfaction. This is my satisfaction. This is using rightly and naturally all that force I feel within me.' I kept on saying this. But there is something within one which rises up and defies a lie--however beautiful the lie is, however noble it is. And I think even a lie can sometimes be both. Don't you, Emile?" It almost seemed to him for a moment that she knew his lie and Gaspare's. "Yes," he said. "I do think so." "Well, that lie of mine--it was defied. And it had no more courage." "I want you to tell me something," he said, quietly. "I want you to tell me what has happened to-day." "To-day?" |
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