times, because he admitted he deserved it; but when it came to
hanging him five or six million times, once a month, for, say,
five million months, or twelve times a year for 415,000 years,
he didn't like it, and wouldn't stand it, and wanted to submit
the question to arbitration.

"Nicholas observed that the word arbitration was not in his
especially expurgated dictionary, whereupon Bonaparte remarked
that he wasn't responsible for that; that he thought it a
good word and worthy of incorporation in any dictionary and
in all vocabularies.

"'I don't care what you think,' retorted his Majesty. 'It's
what I don't think that goes;' and he commanded his imps
to prepare the gallows on the third Thursday of each month
for Bonaparte's expiation; ordered his secretary to send
Bonaparte a type-written notice that his presence on each
occasion was expected, and gave orders to the police to see
that he was there willy-nilly. Naturally Bonaparte resisted,
and appealed to the courts. Blackstone sustained his appeal,
and Nicholas overruled him. The first Thursday came, and the
police went for the Emperor, but he was surrounded by a good
half of the men who had fought under him, and the minions
of the law could do nothing against them. In consequence,
Bonaparte's brother, Joseph, a quiet, inoffensive citizen,
was dragged from his home and hanged in his place, Nicholas
contending that when a soldier could not, or would not, serve,
the government had a right to expect a substitute. Well,"
said Boswell, at this point, "that set all Hades on fire. We
were divided as to Bonaparte's deserts, but the hanging of