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The Portygee by Joseph Crosby Lincoln
page 32 of 474 (06%)
play-actin' men and women hollered and screamed to music for a couple
of hours." Olive, his wife, had attended an opera once and, according
to her, it was more like a cat fight than anything else. Nobody but
foreigners ever had anything to do with operas. And for foreigners of
all kinds--but the Latin variety of foreigner in particular--Captain
Zelotes Snow cherished a detest which was almost fanatic.

And now his daughter, his own Janie, was receiving ardent love
letters from a play-acting foreigner, a Spaniard, a "Portygee," a
"macaroni-eater"! When finally convinced that it was true, that the
letters had really been written to Jane, which took some time, he
demanded first of all to be shown the "Portygee." Miss Donaldson could
not, of course, produce the latter forthwith, but she directed her irate
visitor to the theater where the opera company was then performing. To
the theater Captain Zelotes went. He did not find Speranza there, but
from a frightened attendant he browbeat the information that the singer
was staying at a certain hotel. So the captain went to the hotel. It was
eleven o'clock in the morning, Senor Speranza was in bed and could not
be disturbed. Couldn't, eh? By the great and everlasting et cetera and
continued he was going to be disturbed then and there. And unless some
of the hotel's "hired help" set about the disturbing it would be done
for them. So, rather than summon the police, the hotel management
summoned its guest, and the first, and only, interview between the
father and lover of Jane Snow took place.

It was not a long interview, but it was spirited. Captain Zelotes began
by being what he considered diplomatic. Having assured his wife before
leaving home, and the alarmed Miss Donaldson subsequently, that there
was to be no trouble whatever--everything would be settled as smooth
and easy as slidin' downhill; "that feller won't make any fuss, you'll
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