him up in a dark closit, previsly whippin him arter the stile
of muthers when thare orfsprings git onruly. Sumptimes when he
went in swimmin thay'd go to the banks of the Lake & steal all
his close, thereby compellin him to sneek home by a sircootius
rowt, drest in the Skanderlus stile of the Greek Slaiv. "I
find that the keers of a marrid life way hevy onto me," sed the
Profit, "& sumtimes I wish I'd remaned singel." I left the
Profit and startid for the tavern whare I put up to. On my way
I was overtuk by a lurge krowd of Mormons, which they
surroundid me & statid that they were goin into the Show free.

"Wall," sez I, "ef I find a individooal who is goin round
lettin folks into his show free, I'll let you know."

"We've had a Revelashun biddin us go into A. Wards's Show
without payin nothin!" thay showtid.

"Yes," hollered a lot of femaile Mormonesses, ceasin me by the
cote tales & swingin me round very rapid, "we're all goin in
free! So sez the Revelashun!"

"What's Old Revelashun got to do with my show?" sez I, gittin
putty rily. "Tell Mister Revelashun," sed I, drawin myself up
to my full hite and lookin round upon the ornery krowd with a
prowd & defiant mean, "tell Mister Revelashun to mind his own
bizness, subject only to the Konstitushun of the United
States!"

"Oh now let us in, that's a sweet man," sed several femails,
puttin thare arms round me in luvin style. "Become 1 of us.