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The Complete Works of Artemus Ward — Part 1: Essays, Sketches, and Letters by Artemus Ward
page 26 of 227 (11%)
of contented idleness. If you only thought so, Jefferson, you
could live for months WITHOUT PERFORMING ANY KIND OF LABOR, and
at the expiration of that time FEEL FRESH AND VIGOROUS ENOUGH TO
COMMENCE IT AGAIN. Idleness refreshes the physical organization
--IT IS A SWEET BOON! Strike at the roots of the destroying habit
to-day, Jefferson. It tires you out; resolve to be idle; no one
should labor; HE SHOULD HIRE OTHERS TO DO IT FOR HIM;" and then
he would fix his mournful eyes on Jeff. and hand him a dollar,
while the eyes of the wonder-struck darkey would gaze in mute
admiration upon the good and wise originator of the only theory
which the darkey mind could appreciate. As Jeff. went away to
tell the wonderful story to his companions, and backed it with
the dollar as material proof, Artemus would cover his eyes, and
bend forward on his elbows in a chuckling laugh.

"Among the Mormons" was delivered through the States, everywhere
drawing immense crowds. His manner of delivering his discourse
was grotesque and comical beyond description. His quaint and sad
style contributed more than anything else to render his
entertainment exquisitely funny. The programme was exceedingly
droll, and the tickets of admission presented the most ludicrous
of ideas. The writer presents a fac-simile of an admission
ticket which was presented to him in Natchez by Mr. Browne:--

ADMIT THE BEARER
AND ONE WIFE.
YOURS TROOLY,
A. WARD.

In the spring of 1866, Charles Browne first timidly thought of
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