"I do," sed he; sayin which he walked up to the cage and sez
he, "let's try moral swashun upon the poor creeter." So he put
his hand upon the Kangeroo's hed and sed, "poor little fellow--
poor little fellow--your master is very crooil, isn't he, my
untootered frend," when the Kangaroo, with a terrific yell,
grabd the Perfesser by the hand and cum very near chawin it
orf. It was amoozin to see the Perfesser jump up and scream
with pane. Sez I, "that's one of the poor little fellow's
excentrissities!"

Sez he, "Mister Ward, that's a dangerous quadruped. He's
totally depraved. I will retire and do my lasserated hand up in
a rag, and meanwhile I request you to meat out summery and
severe punishment to the vishus beest," I hosswhipt the little
cuss for upwards of 15 minutes. Guess I licked sum of his
excentrissity out of him.

Oberlin is a grate plase. The College opens with a prayer and
then the New York Tribune is read. A kolleckshun is then taken
up to buy overkoats with red horn buttons onto them for the
indignant cullured people of Kanady. I have to contribit
librally two the glowrius work, as they kawl it hear. I'm
kompelled by the Fackulty to reserve front seets in my show for
the cullered peple. At the Boardin House the cullered peple
sit at the first table. What they leeve is maid into hash for
the white peple. As I don't like the idee of eatin my vittles
with Ethiopians, I sit at the seckind table, and the
konsequence is I've devowered so much hash that my inards is in
a hily mixt up condishun. Fish bones hav maid their appearance
all over my boddy and pertater peelins air a springin up