"Our venerable friend," said the schoolmaster, smilin'
pleasantly, "isn't posted in Virgil."

"No, I don't know him. But if he's a able-bodied man he must
stand his little draft."

The schoolmaster wound up in eloquent style, and the
subscriber took the stand.

I said the crisis had not only cum itself, but it had brought
all its relations. It has cum, I said, with a evident
intention of makin' us a good long visit. It's goin' to take
off its things and stop with us. My wife says so too. This
is a good war. For those who like this war, it's just such a
kind of war as they like. I'll bet ye. My wife says so too.
If the Federal army succeeds in takin' Washington, and they
seem to be advancin' that way pretty often, I shall say it is
strategy, and Washington will be safe. And that noble banner,
as it were--that banner, as it were--will be a emblem, or
rather, I should say, that noble banner--AS IT WERE. My wife
says so too. [I got a little mixed up here, but they didn't
notice it. Keep mum.] Feller citizens, it will be a proud
day for this Republic when Washington is safe. My wife says
so too.

The editor of the "Bugle-Horn of Liberty" here arose and said:
"I do not wish to interrupt the gentleman, but a impertant
despatch has just bin received at the telegraph office here.
I will read it. It is as follows: GOV'MENT IS ABOUT TO TAKE