The Complete Works of Artemus Ward — Part 3: Stories and Romances by Artemus Ward
page 40 of 50 (80%)
page 40 of 50 (80%)
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in the distance, only made the scene more desolate and dreary.
The ground was paced off and the men arranged. While this was being done, the surgeon, by the light of a dark lantern, arranged his instruments, which consisted of 1 common hand-saw, 1 hatchet, 1 butcher knife, a large variety of smaller knives, and a small mountain of old rag. Neither of the principals exhibited any fear. Culkins insisted that, as the challenging party, he had the right to the word fire. This, after a bitter discussion, was granted. He urged his seconds to place him facing towards the town, so that the lights would be in his favour. This was done without any trouble, the immense benefits of that position not being discovered by Smith's second. "If I fall," said Culkins to his second, "see me respectably buried and forward bill to Connaught. Believe me, it will be cashed." The arms (horse-pistols) were given to the men, and one of Culkins's seconds said: "Gentlemen, are you ready?" SMITH:--Ready. CULKINS:--Ready. The blood of the Culkinses is aroused! SECOND:--One, Two, Three--fire! Culkins's pistol didn't go off. Smith didn't fire. "That was generous in Smith not to fire," said a second. |
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