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The Complete Works of Artemus Ward — Part 4: To California and Return by Artemus Ward
page 22 of 72 (30%)
As soon as a mining camp begins to assume the proportions of a
city, at about the time the whiskey-vender draws his cork or the
gambler spreads his green cloth, Maguire opens a theatre, and with
a hastily-organized "Vigilance Committee" of actors, commences to
execute Shakespeare.

4.6. MR. PEPPER.

My arrival at Virginia City was signalized by the following
incident:

I had no sooner achieved my room in the garret of the International
Hotel than I was called upon by an intoxicated man who said he was
an Editor. Knowing how rare it was for an Editor to be under the
blighting influence of either spiritous or malt liquors, I received
this statement doubtfully. But I said:

"What name?"

"Wait!" he said, and went out.

I heard him pacing unsteadily up and down the hall outside. In ten
minutes he returned, and said:

"Pepper!"

Pepper was indeed his name. He had been out to see if he could
remember it; and he was so flushed with his success that he
repeated it joyously several times, and then, with a short laugh he
went away.
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