The Complete Works of Artemus Ward — Part 7: Miscellaneous by Artemus Ward
page 19 of 76 (25%)
page 19 of 76 (25%)
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circumstances bein very much agin her, and also accoosed of havin a
hansum young man hid in her house. But does this bold young Hibernian forsake her? Not much, he dont. But he takes it all on himself, sez he is the guilty wretch, and is marcht off to prison. This is a new idea. It is gin'rally the wife who suffers, in the play, for her husband; but here's a noble young feller who shuts both his eyes to the apparent sinfulness of his new young wife, and takes her right square to his bosom. It was bootiful to me, who love my wife, and believe in her, and would put on my meetin clothes and go to the gallus for her cheerfully, ruther than believe she was capable of taking anybody's money but mine. My marrid friends, listen to me: If you treat your wives as though' they were perfeck gentlemen--if you show 'em that you have entire confidence in them-- believe me, they will be troo to you most always. I was so pleased with this conduct of Shaun that I hollered out, "Good boy! Come and see me!" "Silence!" sum people said. "Put him out!" said a sweet-scented young man, with all his new clothes on, and in company with a splendid waterfall, "put this old fellow out!" "My young friend," said I, in a loud voice, "whose store do you sell tape in? I might want to buy a yard before I go hum." Shaun is tried by a Military Commission. Colonel O'Grady, although a member of the Commission, shows he sympathizes with Shaun, and |
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