Arter that I went down and finished the mahogany. (Brandy and water,
the ruddy appearance of which indicates that very little of the
latter has been used in its composition. Spanish is the stronger,
and Honduras the milder mixture.)

A. WARD.

7.22. A. WARD AMONG THE MORMONS.--REPORTED BY HIMSELF--OR SOMEBODY
ELSE.

(The following rough report of Artemus Ward's Lecture in California
Appeared in the "San Francisco Era," during the lecturer's visit to
that city. It has been thought worthy of preservation in the form
of a supplementary paper to the present little volume.

FELLER-CITIZENS AND FELLER-CITIZENESSES,--I feel truly glad to see
you here to-night, more especially those who have paid, although I am
too polite to say how many are here who have not paid, but who take a
base advantage of the good-nature of my friend and manager, Hingston,
bothering him to give them free tickets, gratis, and also for
nothing; and my former friend and manager, Rosenberg, assures me that
the best way to prevent a person from enjoying any entertainment is
to admit them without the equivalent spondulics. What a man gets for
nothing he don't care for.

Talking of free tickets, my first lecture was a wonderful success--
house so full that everybody who could pay turned from the doors. It
happened thus: