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The Register by William Dean Howells
page 30 of 50 (60%)
MISS REED: "Oh, the horrid thing!"

GRINNIDGE: "If you humble yourself to a woman at all, do it
thoroughly. If you go halfway down she'll be tempted to push you the
rest of the way. If you flatten out at her feet to begin with, ten
to one but she will pick you up."

RANSOM: "Yes, that was my idea."

MISS REED: "Oh, was it, indeed! Well!"

RANSOM: "But I've nothing to do with her picking me up or pushing me
down. All that I've got to do is to go and surrender myself."

GRINNIDGE: "Yes. Well; I guess you can't go too soon. I like your
company; but I advise you as a friend not to lose time. Where does
she live?"

RANSOM: "That's the remarkable part of it: she lives in this
house."

MISS REED and Miss Spaulding, in subdued chorus: "Oh!"

GRINNIDGE, taking his pipe out of his mouth in astonishment: "No!"

RANSOM: "I just came in here to give my good resolutions a rest
while I was screwing my courage up to ask for her."

MISS REED: "Don't you think he's VERY humorous? Give his good
resolutions a rest! That's the way he ALWAYS talks."
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