VARINKA. Heaven is my witness, Little English Father, we need
someone who is not afraid of him. He is so strong! I hope you
will throw him down on the floor many, many, many times.

PATIOMKIN [behind the screen]. Varinka!

VARINKA. Yes?

PATIOMKIN. Go and look through the keyhole of the Imperial
bed-chamber; and bring me word whether the Empress is awake yet.

VARINKA. Fi donc! I do not look through keyholes.

PATIOMKIN [emerging, having arranged his shirt and put on his
diamonded coat]. You have been badly brought up, little darling.
Would any lady or gentleman walk unannounced into a room without
first looking through the keyhole? [Taking his sword from the
table and putting it on.] The great thing in life is to be
simple; and the perfectly simple thing is to look through
keyholes. Another epigram: the fifth this morning! Where is my
fool of a chancellor? Where is Popof?

EDSTASTON [choking with suppressed laughter]!!!!

PATIOMKIN [gratified]. Darling, you appreciate my epigram.

EDSTASTON. Excuse me. Pop off! Ha! ha! I can't help laughing:
What's his real name, by the way, in case I meet him?