SUBURBAN ITEM

"Yesterday at the police court of Surbiton-on-Thames Mary Forrester,
a servant in the employ of Mr. S. Bung was taken into custody on
a charge of having put a noxious preparation, possibly poison, into
the coffee of her employer's family. The young woman was remanded
for a week."

Look at that. Mary Forrester a servant?

How wide was she round the chest? It doesn't say. Mr. S. Bung? Of
what club was he a member? None, apparently. Then who cares if he
is poisoned? And "the young woman!" What a way to speak of a decent
girl who never did any other harm than to poison a club man. And
the English magistrate! What a tame part he must have played: his
name indeed doesn't occur at all: apparently he didn't enlarge on
the girl's good looks, or "comment on her attractive appearance,"
or anything. I don't suppose that he even asked Mary Forrester out
to lunch with him.

Notice also that, according to the English way of writing the thing
up, as soon as the girl was remanded for a week the incident is
closed. The English reporter doesn't apparently know enough to follow
Miss De Forrest to her home (called "the De Forrest Residence" and
marked with a cross, +) . The American reporter would make certain to
supplement what went above with further information of this fashion.
"Miss De Forrest when seen later at her own home by a representative
of The Eagle said that she regretted very much having been put to the
necessity of poisoning Mr. Bung. She had in the personal sense
nothing against Mr. Bung and apart from poisoning him she had every