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Sunshine Sketches of a Little Town by Stephen Leacock
page 106 of 213 (49%)

Of course the excitement was when Henry Mullins at the head of the
table began reading out the telegrams and letters and messages. First
of all there was a telegram of good wishes from the Anglican Lord
Bishop of the Diocese to Henry Mullins and calling him Dear Brother
in Grace the Mariposa telegraph office is a little unreliable and it
read: "Dear Brother in grease," but that was good enough. The Bishop
said that his most earnest wishes were with them.

Then Mullins read a letter from the Mayor of Mariposa Pete Glover was
mayor that year--stating that his keenest desires were with them: and
then one from the Carriage Company saying that its heartiest good
will was all theirs; and then one from the Meat Works saying that its
nearest thoughts were next to them. Then he read one from himself, as
head of the Exchange Bank, you understand, informing him that he had
heard of his project and assuring him of his liveliest interest in
what he proposed.

At each of these telegrams and messages there was round after round
of applause, so that you could hardly hear yourself speak or give an
order. But that was nothing to when Mullins got up again, and beat on
the table for silence and made one of those crackling speeches--just
the way business men speak--the kind of speech that a college man
simply can't make. I wish I could repeat it all. I remember that it
began: "Now boys, you know what we're here for, gentlemen," and it
went on just as good as that all through. When Mullins had done he
took out a fountain pen and wrote out a cheque for a hundred dollars,
conditional on the fund reaching fifty thousand. And there was a
burst of cheers all over the room.

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