Weak as I have proved myself to be, I am still strong
enough to bring this sort of thing to an end. It shall
not happen again. I have sense enough to fly when I
cannot fight. From this Sunday night onward I shall
never sit with Miss Penclosa again. Never! Let the
experiments go, let the research come to an end; any
thing is better than facing this monstrous temptation
which drags me so low. I have said nothing to Miss
Penclosa, but I shall simply stay away. She can tell
the reason without any words of mine.

April 7. Have stayed away as I said. It is a pity to
ruin such an interesting investigation, but it would be
a greater pity still to ruin my life, and I KNOW that I
cannot trust myself with that woman.

11 P. M. God help me! What is the matter with me? Am
I going mad? Let me try and be calm and reason with
myself. First of all I shall set down exactly what
occurred.

It was nearly eight when I wrote the lines with which
this day begins. Feeling strangely restless and uneasy,
I left my rooms and walked round to spend the evening
with Agatha and her mother. They both remarked that I
was pale and haggard. About nine Professor Pratt-
Haldane came in, and we played a game of whist. I
tried hard to concentrate my attention upon the cards,
but the feeling of restlessness grew and grew until I