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John Bull's Other Island by George Bernard Shaw
page 39 of 165 (23%)

THE MAN. Aye, you're a thrue Irish grasshopper.

THE GRASSHOPPER [loudly]. X.X.X.

THE MAN. Three cheers for ould Ireland, is it? That helps you to
face out the misery and the poverty and the torment, doesn't it?

THE GRASSHOPPER [plaintively]. X.X.

THE MAN. Ah, it's no use, me poor little friend. If you could
jump as far as a kangaroo you couldn't jump away from your own
heart an its punishment. You can only look at Heaven from here:
you can't reach it. There! [pointing with his stick to the
sunset] that's the gate o glory, isn't it?

THE GRASSHOPPER [assenting]. X.X.

THE MAN. Sure it's the wise grasshopper yar to know that! But
tell me this, Misther Unworldly Wiseman: why does the sight of
Heaven wring your heart an mine as the sight of holy wather
wrings the heart o the divil? What wickedness have you done to
bring that curse on you? Here! where are you jumpin to? Where's
your manners to go skyrocketin like that out o the box in the
middle o your confession [he threatens it with his stick]?

THE GRASSHOPPER [penitently]. X.

THE MAN [lowering the stick]. I accept your apology; but don't do
it again. And now tell me one thing before I let you go home to
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