"'An' as I says, to show the veneration in which my grandfather is
held, thar's not another yeep out o' any of us. With my father in
the lead, we files out for home; an' tharafter the eepisode is never
mentioned.

"'An' now,' says Colonel Sterctt, 'as we-all is about equipped to
report joodiciously as to the merits of the speshul cask of Valley
Tan we've been samplin', I'll bring my narratif to the closin'
chapters in the life of this grand old man. Thar's this to be
observed: The Sterett fam'ly is eminent for two things: it gets
everything it needs; an' it never gets it till it needs it. Does it
need a gun, or a hoss, or a drink, the Sterett fam'ly proceeds with
the round-up. It befalls that when my grandfather passes his
eightieth year, he decides that he needs religion.

"'" It's about time," he says, "for me to begin layin' up a treasure
above. I'm goin' on eighty-one an' my luck can't last forever."

"'So my grandfather he sets up in bed an' he perooses them
scriptures for four months. I tell you, gents, he shorely searches
that holy book a whole lot. An' then he puts it up he'll be
baptized. Also, that he'll enter down into the water an' rise up out
of the water like it's blazoned in them texts.

"'Seein' she's Janyooary at the time, with two foot of snow on the
ground, it looks like my grandfather will have to postpone them
rites. But he couldn't be bluffed. My grandfather reaches out of bed
an' he rings that bell I tells you-all of, an' proceeds to convene
his niggers. He commands 'em to cut down a big whitewood tree that