HAMPSHIRE FARMER'S ADDRESS--BY W. C. {99}



TO THE SECRETARY OF THE MANAGING COMMITTEE OF DRURY-LANE PLAYHOUSE.
SIR,

To the gewgaw fetters of RHYME (invented by the monks to enslave the
people) I have a rooted objection. I have therefore written an
address for your Theatre in plain, homespun, yeoman's prose; in the
doing whereof I hope I am swayed by nothing but an INDEPENDENT wish
to open the eyes of this gulled people, to prevent a repetition of
the dramatic BAMBOOZLING they have hitherto laboured under. If you
like what I have done, and mean to make use of it, I don't want any
such ARISTOCRATIC reward as a piece of plate with two griffins
sprawling upon it, or a DOG and a JACKASS fighting for a ha'p'worth
of GILT GINGERBREAD, or any such Bartholomew-fair nonsense. All I
ask is that the door-keepers of your play-house may take all the SETS
OF MY REGISTER {24} now on hand, and FORCE every body who enters your
doors to buy one, giving afterwards a debtor and creditor account of
what they have received, POST-PAID, and in due course remitting me
the money and unsold Registers, CARRIAGE-PAID.

I am, &c.
W. C.


IN THE CHARACTER OF A HAMPSHIRE FARMER.