It would be endless to enumerate the exploits we performed in the
course of this confederacy, which became the terror of the whole
village; insomuch that, when different interests divided it, one
of the parties commonly courted the assistance of Roderick Random
(by which name I was known) to cast the balance, and keep the
opposite faction in awe. Meanwhile, I took the advantage of every
play-day to present myself before my grandfather, to whom I seldom
found access, by reason of his being closely besieged by a numerous
family of his female grandchildren, who, though they perpetually
quarrelled among themselves, never failed to join against me, as the
common enemy of all. His heir, who was about the age of eighteen,
minded nothing but fox-hunting, and indeed was qualified for nothing
else, notwithstanding his grandfather's indulgence in entertaining
a tutor for him at home; who at the same time performed the office
of parish clerk. This young Actaeon, who inherited his grandfather's
antipathy to everything in distress, never sat eyes on me without
uncoupling his beagles, and hunting me into some cottage or other,
whither I generally fled for shelter. In this Christian amusement
he was encouraged by his preceptor, who, no doubt, took such
opportunities to ingratiate himself with the rising sun, observing,
that the old gentleman, according to the course of nature, had not
long to live, for he was already on the verge of fourscore.

The behaviour of this rascally sycophant incensed me so much, that
one day, when I was beleaguered by him and his hounds in a farmer's
house, where I had found protection, I took aim at him (being an
excellent marksman) with a large pebble, which struck out four of
his foreteeth, and effectually incapacitated him from doing the
office of a clerk.