Scots, addicted to travelling, justifies my conduct in deriving
an adventurer from that country. That the delicate reader may not
be offended at the unmeaning oaths which proceed from the mouths
of some persons in these memoirs, I beg leave to promise, that
I imagined nothing could more effectually expose the absurdity of
such miserable expletives, than a natural and verbal representation
of the discourse in which they occur.





APOLOGUE




A young painter, indulging a vein of pleasantry, sketched a kind of
conversation piece, representing a bear, an owl, a monkey, and an
ass; and to render it more striking, humorous, and moral, distinguished
every figure by some emblem of human life. Bruin was exhibited in
the garb and attitude of an old, toothless, drunken soldier; the
owl perched upon the handle of a coffee-pot, with spectacle on
nose, seemed to contemplate a newspaper; and the ass, ornamented
with a huge tie-wig (which, however, could not conceal his long
ears), sat for his picture to the monkey, who appeared with the
implements of painting. This whimsical group afforded some mirth,
and met with general approbation, until some mischievous wag hinted
that the whole--was a lampoon upon the friends of the performer; an
insinuation which was no sooner circulated than those very people