respect to Spain was particularly infamous, for though it was in
their power to put an end to the war at once, by sending a large
army thither, they preferred sending a handful of troops, in order
that the war might be prolonged, for no other reason than that it
was of advantage to them. Having paid him an ironical compliment
for his politeness and urbanity, I asked whether he reckoned
amongst the selfish actions of the English government and nation,
their having expended hundreds of millions of pounds sterling, and
an ocean of precious blood, in fighting the battles of Spain and
Portugal against Napoleon. "Surely," said I, "the fort of Elvas
above our heads, and still more the castle of Badajoz over the
water, speak volumes respecting English selfishness, and must,
every time you view them, confirm you in the opinion which you have
just expressed. And then, with respect to the present combat in
Spain, the gratitude which that country evinced to England after
the French, by means of English armies, had been expelled,--
gratitude evinced by discouraging the trade of England on all
occasions, and by offering up masses in thanksgiving when the
English heretics quitted the Spanish shores,--ought now to induce
England to exhaust and ruin herself, for the sake of hunting Don
Carlos out of his mountains. In deference to your superior
judgment," continued I to the officer, "I will endeavour to believe
that it would be for the advantage of England were the war
prolonged for an indefinite period; nevertheless, you would do me a
particular favour by explaining by what process in chemistry blood
shed in Spain will find its way into the English treasury in the
shape of gold."

As he was not ready with his answer, I took up a plate of fruit
which stood on the table beside me, and said, "What do you call