saying or doing something that'll irritate her royal highness."

"Did you quarrel?"

"Quarrel? I never quarrel with anyone; it's bad for one's nerves."

"Did you get as far as proposing?"

"Oh, I left _her_ to do that. Women are making such a row about
their rights nowadays, that it's as well to show you grant them
perfect equality. I gave her every chance of saying something
definite. I maintain that she trifled with my affections. She asked
me what my views in life were. Ah, thought I, now it's coming; and I
answered modestly that everything depended on circumstances. I might
have said it depended on the demand for brass bedsteads; but perhaps
that would have verged on indelicacy--you know that I am delicacy
personified. 'I thought,' said Miss Birching, 'that a man of any
energy made his own circumstances?' 'Energy!' I shouted. 'Do you
look for energy in _me_? It's the greatest compliment anyone ever
paid me.' At that she seemed desperately annoyed, and wouldn't
pursue the subject. That's how it always was, just when the
conversation grew interesting."

"I'm sorry to see you so cut up about it," remarked Hilliard.

"None of your irony, old fellow. Well, the truth is, I've seen
someone I like better."

"Not surprised."