to support me: I was very weak. He read to me, and then asked me to
marry him. He asked again. I lay in bed one night, and with my eyes
open, I saw the dangers of women, and the trouble of my father and
sister; and pits of wickedness. I saw like places full of snakes. I had
such a yearning for protection. I gave him my word I would be his wife,
if he was not ashamed of a wife like me. I wished to look once in
father's face. I had fancied that Rhoda would spurn me, when she
discovered my falsehood. She--sweet dear! would she ever? Go to her.
Say, I do not love any man. I am heart-dead. I have no heart except for
her. I cannot love a husband. He is good, and it is kind: but, oh! let
me be spared. His face!--"

She pressed her hands tight into the hollow of her eyes.

"No; it can't be meant. Am I very ungrateful? This does not seem to be
what God orders. Only if this must be! only if it must be! If my sister
cannot look on me without! He is good, and it is unselfish to take a
moneyless, disgraced creature: but, my misery!--If my sister will see me,
without my doing this!--Go to her, Mr. Robert. Say, Dahlia was false,
and repents, and has worked with her needle to subsist, and can, and
will, for her soul strives to be clean. Try to make her understand.
If Rhoda could love you, she would know. She is locked up--she is only
ideas. My sweet is so proud. I love her for her pride, if she will only
let me creep to her feet, kiss her feet. Dear Mr. Robert, help me! help
me! I will do anything she says. If she says I am to marry him, I will.
Don't mind my tears--they mean nothing now. Tell my dear, I will obey
her. I will not be false any more to her. I wish to be quite stripped.
And Rhoda may know me, and forgive me, if she can. And--Oh! if she
thinks, for father's sake, I ought, I will submit and speak the words;
I will; I am ready. I pray for mercy."