bullying and open contempt in childhood. The thing to avoid, for
all who are responsible in the smallest degree for the nurture of
children, is to call in the influence of fear; one may speak
plainly of consequences, but even there one must not exaggerate, as
schoolmasters often do, for the best of motives, about moral
faults; one may punish deliberate and repeated disobedience, wanton
cruelty, persistent and selfish disregard of the rights of others,
but one must warn many times, and never try to triumph over a fault
by the infliction of a shock of any kind. The shock is the most
cruel and cowardly sort of punishment, and if we wilfully use it,
then we are perpetuating the sad tyranny of instinctive fear, and
using the strength of a great angel to do the work of a demon, such
as I saw long ago in the old magazine, and felt its tyranny for
many days.

As a child the one thing I was afraid of was the possibility of my
father's displeasure. We did not see a great deal of him, because
he was a much occupied headmaster; and he was to me a stately and
majestic presence, before whom the whole created world seemed
visibly to bow. But he was deeply anxious about our upbringing, and
had a very strong sense of his responsibility; and he would
sometimes reprove us rather sternly for some extremely trifling
thing, the way one ate one's food, or spoke, or behaved. This
descended upon me as a cloud of darkness; I attempted no excuses, I
did not explain or defend myself; I simply was crushed and
confounded. I do not think it was the right method. He never
punished us, but we were not at ease with him. I remember the agony
with which I heard a younger sister once repeat to him some silly
and profane little jokes which a good-natured and absurd old lady
had told us in the nursery. I felt sure he would disapprove, as he