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Nonsense Novels by Stephen Leacock
page 51 of 150 (34%)
Meanwhile the days passed. Life at the Taws moved in the
ordinary routine of a great English household. At 7 a gong
sounded for rising, at 8 a horn blew for breakfast, at 8.30
a whistle sounded for prayers, at 1 a flag was run up at
half-mast for lunch, at 4 a gun was fired for afternoon tea,
at 9 a first bell sounded for dressing, at 9.15 a second bell
for going on dressing, while at 9.30 a rocket was sent up to
indicate that dinner was ready. At midnight dinner was over,
and at 1 a.m. the tolling of a bell summoned the domestics to
evening prayers.

Meanwhile the month allotted by the Earl to Lord Ronald was
passing away. It was already July 15, then within a day or
two it was July 17, and, almost immediately afterwards, July 18.

At times the Earl, in passing Ronald in the hall, would say
sternly, "Remember, boy, your consent, or I disinherit you."

And what were the Earl's thoughts of Gertrude? Here was the
one drop of bitterness in the girl's cup of happiness. For
some reason that she could not divine the Earl showed signs
of marked antipathy.

Once as she passed the door of the library he threw a bootjack
at her. On another occasion at lunch alone with her he struck
her savagely across the face with a sausage.

It was her duty to translate to the Earl his Russian
correspondence. She sought in it in vain for the mystery.
One day a Russian telegram was handed to the Earl. Gertrude
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