fault with a country before they have taken the trouble to inquire
into its merits, are very ignorant and impertinent people.

"This was blow for blow, as you perceive; and the TEAZE-AND-TWIT
system was now continued with great animation on both sides.

"The lob-worm inquired, with a conceited wriggle, what could be the
merits of a country, where gentlemanly, gliding, thin-skinned
creatures like himself were unable to move about without personal
annoyance? Whereupon the amiable 'SOMETHING' made no scruple of
telling the lob-worm that his BETTERS found no fault with the place,
and instanced its friend and admirer the Alderney cow.

"On which the lob-worm affected forgetfulness, and exclaimed, 'Cow?
cow? do I know the creature? Ah! Yes, I recollect now; clumsy legs,
horny feet, and that sort of thing,' proceeding to hint that what was
good enough for a cow, might yet not be refined enough for his own
more delicate habits.

"'It is my misfortune, perhaps,' concluded he, with mock humility,
'to have been accustomed to higher associations; but really, situated
as I am here, I could almost feel disposed to--why, positively, to
wish myself a cow, with clumsy legs and horny feet. What one may
live to come to, to be sure!'

"Well," Aunt Judy proceeded, "will you believe it, the lob-worm went
on boasting till the poor deluded 'SOMETHING' believed every word he
said, and at last ventured to ask in what favoured spot he had
acquired his superior tastes and knowledge.